There’s a regular practice of dealing with belief systems among EFT (emotional freedom technique) practitioners. In one of the EFT newsletters, Gary Craig writes:
“For disbelieving EFT newcomers it helps to “build a bridge” to their belief systems. An effective way to do this is to build on their existing beliefs with language of the general form…. “EFT is like [what they believe in] with the addition of [an EFT feature]“. For example, if you know someone who believes in hypnotherapy you could say, “EFT is like hypnotherapy but with the addition of an important body element.” You could also be creative with the language and say something like, “Chiropractors like to use EFT because it adds an important emotional element.” Note how it builds from an existing belief. Use your imagination. You can build a bridge from EFT to almost anything else with this language pattern.“
Let’s elaborate on Gary’s practice of working with personal belief systems by discovering a person’s personality dimensions. I discuss this concept in detail at EFT vs. Ancient Keys, but I would like to elaborate upon it for your further understanding.
These questions are taken from the course on Keys To Power Persuasion. In revealing a person’s personality dimensions, you discover and use the same ideas your client uses within his/her concept of reality.
Let’s say that the subject of conversation is about your client’s health and the client is obese. Please understand that noone is 100% in any particular direction (because of complex motivations set by culture.) The personality dimension will, in one way or another encompass the opposites of the personality dimension, so they waver towards one end or the other. For example:
- How do you feel about getting into shape so you can be healthier?
- This question reveals if a person is mainly a pain avoider or a pleasure seeker. In all likely hood, obese people are mostly pain avoiders since they’ve built a wall of “insulation” around them. You would speak to this person in terms of avoiding pain. An adjunct to this question would be, “How do you feel about being out of shape?” That is, if your client has already mentioned this of himself.
- What about being healthy is important to you?
- The answer to this question reveals if a person is emotional or logical. Does the person want to feel good or does she want to fit into smaller clothes because she can’t afford any more big clothes? etc. An adjunct to this question is “what about being obese is important to you?” Of course, You would ask such a question only if the client denotes some sort of importance to her condition.
- How would you describe being healthy?
- The answer to this question reveals if your client is detail oriented or thinks in terms of big pictures. Obviously you would ask this question only if the client was healthy sometime in his life. An adjunct to this question is, “How do imagine yourself being healthy?” if the person has always had health problems.
- What do you consider as a good time – like the ideal vacation?
- The answer to this question reveals if your client is self-centered (a loner) or other centered (a joiner). (FYI: Most of the people who spend time on the web are loners, although they believe they’re joiners by belonging to all sorts of web-based groups.) Your response should appeal to wherever their pride lies.
A loner likes to think he’s a special, one of a kind person, among the few who are able to do or make certain things. A loner has a lot of pride in himself whereas a joiner his pride in his group by spending quality social time with them.
- How do you know if a diet and exercise plan is good?
- The answer to this question reveals if your client is a leader or a follower. FYI: Most people are followers. Very few people are leaders. It helps to ask this question anyway. Because a person tends to lean one way or another, you would speak with her in those terms.
For example, if a person says, “Well, I like to hear about the success of other people who tried it, but I don’t really know until I’ve tried it for myself.” Since the client mentions first, that she wants to hear the success stories of others, she leans more towards being a follower. Then you would talk with her in terms of how much success the method has had with others in the past.
Thanks for your time!
Randolph, HealingMindN Medicine Man